Saturday, December 30, 2006
Australia. What fresh hell is this?
So I finally got around to watching The Proposition last night. "That's not from The Proposition!" you say. "Bite me," says I.
Well hmmm. I appear to be the only one out there who hadn't seen it yet AND...yes, the only one who hated it. It was gorgeous, I give it that. And it successfully made everyone totally filthy, way to go. (Which is why you'll take the hot Guy Pearce & tiger cub pic and you'll like it).
And if in my ramblings I inadvertently give something away, I apologize. If you haven't seen it and plan to, I might not read this paragraph (or two). I won't go into details, if that helps. Every. Single. Person. Sucked. Wait, wait, wait. Yes, I can watch a film wherein I don't like anyone, but seriously, I didn't empathize with anyone, except Emily Watson and Ray Winstone, who is the good guy, I guess? And dude! Don't they know that Emily Watson rape scenes are a -1,000 points right there? What the fuck? Granted it was a tame-ish rape scene (what the hell am I saying??) and the ending went the right way, but how was this not a totally predictable and loathsome film? As soon as she put on that Christmas dress and made everything all pretty I thought, "You're so getting raped." And while Westerns may have a hard time surprising us, this one had nothing redeeming to offer in exchange. I just fucking hated it. It had absolutely nothing going for it. I adore Guy Pearce and Emily Watson, but I've got about ten other films apiece should I need a fix.
I thought the characters were ok, but again, didn't give two shits about anyone. The story was obvious from start to finish. I felt no tension (and again, did I mention how much I DIDN'T CARE) and while normally gore and violence are great by me so long as the story is actually good, here it was just distracting. Like they spent all their time on the blood instead of the story (and imdb.com backs me up here: Nick Cave finished the script in three weeks! It FEELS like it! Sorry, Nick Cave.) Instead I just dreaded the end I knew was coming, which, although suitable, came a little too late for my taste.
Why didn't I just post a review on Big Suck Loser, you ask? Well, first of all, skincarver already did and loved it (9/10, sorry!), and also because I don't think this is really a "review", but more of a "bitchrant".
I wanted to watch Kamikaze Girls again, but NetFUCKERS sent me a CRACKED copy. So instead you get to read my bitchrant.
Also watched Why We Fight, which was decent. Far less "fair and balanced" than I'd heard (they had ONE dude every once in a while state a view from the other side), but since I agree with it of course I'm going to like it.
And D didn't hate The Proposition the way I did. He thought it was ok but doesn't need to see it again. So there's fair and balanced for you.