Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Take me now, subcreature.

I was up kinda late playing with wedding photos...my Mac is being hella slow and there are, like, 400 photos! (Sorry, Emily, almost done!)

And you know, I don't think I ever mentioned the prezzies I got in San Francisco! Emily gave me this GORGEOUS Vera Wang dress I wear as often as possible--a little dark purple number with a black velvet sash. It's very, very cute.

Also got a set of Look Better Naked, a black currant body exfoliating set. It lead to an altercation at the airport I didn't write about because someone upstaged me with his little TSA story.

It's NOT LIQUID. But it's also NOT SOLID. So there I am at 6 in the AM...ok, wait. I should probably back up. I was only bringing a carry-on. And I was paying $800 for a hotel room, and I was going alone...so I felt the need to...ah, bring my own entertainment, shall we say. If you know about the intervention episode of Sex & the City, you know what I had in my bag.

Anyway, I took it through the TSA in DFW and no one said a word, no one gave me shit. I noticed some discreet giggling, but no biggie. Leaving San Fran? Not the case. Guy full-on had to cover his mouth in what could pretty much be described as a guffaw, and then a woman took me aside and rifled through my bag. In San Fran-fucking-cisco. And I don't know if they were messing with me because of that or the bath stuff.

Long story short, I'm standing there arguing the semantics of liquid v. solid and whether a body mask really qualifies as a concern for homeland security (AND AND AND!!! if it was 3.4 oz it would have been okay but it was FIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE oz so god for-fucking-bid it make it on the plane).

Unlike some people, I did not stash it against my privy bits (since first of all, it was way too big and secondly, it did not occur to me), but rather let her confiscate it. I ordered another one when I got home, so fuck it.

Editor's Note: It occurs to me, upon re-reading that last paragraph, that I should really clarify that I'm talking about the bath set, not the other thing.

But those were the really great maid of honor prezzies Emily gave me. I'll have to take pics of the Vera Wang dress, it really is perfect. So frickin' cute.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, you would think they would see kinkier shit than that* in the San Fran airports on an hourly basis!

*If I'm understanding you correctly, ahem*

Ellen Aim said...

you are! And I know, I mean, it was nearly June and time for Pink Saturday and gay pride, wtf???

Anonymous said...

They wouldn't let you bring your MST3K collection!?!? THOSE BASTARDS!

Ellen Aim said...

lol! I know! Actually, they did let me bring it, but I don't know why they were laughing, I guess it's just an impressive collection...

Veloute said...

I am so sorry it got confiscated, but I am glad you clarified that next to last paragraph b/c I was not sure which item you were going to stash next to your privy bits. (Loved the story about the Aveda lotion near the bits, though XD XD XD...what has the world come to??)

I'm surprised at this since it was San Fran! Huh.

NEED to see the Vera Wang dress. Awesome!!

Ellen Aim said...

They wouldn't (supposedly) be allowed to confiscate the other thing--there would be no reason. One airline (Delta) got majorly sued once for some embarrassment they caused a woman. (Wasn't at TSA, the airline stewardesses did it on the plane...but then again, someone hadn't taken her batteries out...!!)

I know, the Aveda lotion story is so great.

I'll take pics soon!