Monday, June 14, 2010

Why don't you tell everyone I said to go fuck themselves for making my high school years a living hell?

Wow, Air France, wow. So I got an e-mail from them saying (first in French but then luckily in English), yeah your 5:40 flight? It's gonna be at 8:00pm, go suck it.

And you know, whatever, who cares, that's fine, but uh, my flight LEAVING PARIS does so at 7:30am and NOW my flight gets in at 8:30am, also meaning the next flight at 9:45 to Denmark is not an option. So NOW I get to leave Paris at 12:45, and I'm barely going to get into Sweden by 4:00, the latest our liaison is going to be around. (I sent her an email.)

This is probably all fine but what really is taking years off my life...is the hold music Air France has. NO. SHIT. 1-800-237-2747. You have to call it and press 2 for booking and listen. I guarantee you will get it--I was on hold for THIRTY MOTHER-FUCKING MINUTES before a woman answered. It's like being drunk underwater listening to a music box in hell, tested thoroughly for maximum insanity. It's a little two-minute clip that repeats over and over and over and I have never been more sure how easy it is to make the human mind snap and FUCKING EAT PEOPLE'S GODDAMN BRAINS OUT.

I can be quite patient but OHMYFUCKINGGODTHEMUUUUUUUUUUUSIC. Holy Jesus.

And I'm still listening to it. A very unsympathetic (but efficient) French woman helped me but switched me over to ticketing. And that woman is supposed going to send me an email? I am not sure and I have forgotten anything we talked about because this is already heading toward another 30 minute stretch.

Ok, all over and done with and it really didn't matter much. I just get into Denmark way later, and Sweden later. Kind of annoying actually. Gee and now I have four hours in Paris instead of 90 minutes. Not really what I was after...

I was perfectly polite to those two women, by the way, who are making me realize that I should go ahead now and forget all about that false American customer service concern so often dripping over any inconvenience. Not that I need that, but it's good to know ahead of time not to expect it...

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