Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. One semester down, five more to go. The first year is supposed to be the worst, but I don't know if the first or second semester is the ugliest. The first semester hurts because it's new and the midterms (and one final) are stressful--but then next semester my hours are longer, the winter gets meaner and the finals are 75%, as opposed to the 25% they were for midterms.
Criminal Law was my last one, a final. Next semester I have Constitutional Law instead, in a smaller section and for twice as long. JOY. On the bright side, the book was $150 and I found one for $40 online. (Something about a broken cover, ask me if I care.)
The criminal law final wins the humor contest, though, since I actually snickered out loud twice while reading it. He clearly had a lot of fun writing it, using current events to make every conceivable felony we studied happen. Some guy was trying to make a new reality TV show but he wanted to pull a publicity stunt first, so he got a guy to get him a gun, some explosives, and some seed money. He got that guy's wife--with whom he was having an affair--to steal a homemade balloon from the college where she was working. At some point, he put the explosives in his trunk and due to a defect and extreme heat, they went off and killed a passerby. He went to go meet up with the other guy to give him the gun, but the wife was home and when the friend came home, caught them together. The wife had some fairly inflammatory things to say, including that their children weren't his after all and they infact had a stash of frozen embryos and were going to have babies forever. As you can imagine, there was some attempted murder, but someone walking by outside got shot intead, which they all covered up. The jilted husband went online and got his assistant to find the embryos (known as "frosties"), and as he instructed him, "Toast those frosties!"
I am very fond of this professor.
The publicity stunt ended up being a take on the whole balloon boy hoax (so how funny that their sentence got handed down today), but the kid was really in the balloon here, but died when a helicopter pilot flew too close and the balloon was destroyed. The kid had already become unconscious due to the altitude, but upon discovering the dead body, the fact pattern noted, ("An autopsy report is still pending,") which made me chuckle, I admit it.
And that was just the first fact pattern. So there was potential burglary, robbery, involuntary manslaughter with potential 2nd degree murder, conspiracy, attempt, extortion, damn, it's a three hour exam and we all could have written more.
Anyway, I'm at the airport now, trying to fly home. I am five hours early, in the hopes of snaking something on standby. This probably would have been more likely if a flight to my city hadn't been diverted this morning, don't know what that was about. So there's about twenty people on standby for a flight at 4:30 connecting through New York. I'll stick with my direct flight, thanks. Of all the cities to get stuck in, I'd take LGA, but really, I'd like to pass on that altogether, mmmkay.
And because it occurred to me about a week ago I have NO PRESENTS for my nieces, I get to go shopping on xmas eve! Smart, that's me. I'm dragging their mother, Veloute along, so she can point to stuff and I can buy it. Win.
I have two books with me, Shutter Island by Dennis Lehane and The Road by Cormac McCarthy. If I can find an outlet, I shelled out $7.95 for the honor of using the airport wifi. (SOME airports let you use it for free, but WHATEVER.) So I can play online, and I do have two DVDs--To Sir, With Love and the first disc, first season of XXXholic: Vol 1, neither of which I've seen before.
On the other hand, the bartender here now knows my name and started off by trying to get me a Bloody Mary. Nice. I'm opting for white wine since I don't wish for any of my drinks to revisit me on the flight, kwim? And he's pouring freely from the bottle for refills rather than bringing me normal glasses, so this could be the place to stay for a bit... ;)