Too late for salvation, my friend.

I think this is an actual residence. (On campus, I mean. I'm not just standing in someone's yard.) Like, people live here. It is GORGEOUS. Like, messed up gorgeous.



We had lunch at a pub the other day, and this is Vel trying to figure out the intricacies of a, you know, parking meter. Don't pay any attention to the boatloads of trash behind us...



And that bell tower? Here it is.



I have been looking at the cost of living in Hughes Hall (which you can only do the first year) and living in other parts of Ithaca (omfg, how GODDAMN expensive is THAT) and all I know is that I need to start studying one whole fuck of a lot and eating rice and beans and...well, doing a shitload of praying. Good times.

Oh honey, I've got a fake laugh with your name written all over it.

Wow. Holy fucking wow.

Um. So, Cornell is GORGEOUS, like who didn't see that coming? The contracts class was WAY more interesting than I thought it would be...it wasn't the dry dreariness I expected. They discussed cases and it was easy to follow along! Granted, it was a 1L class and it's early in the semester but woo!

How many movies has this been in? It's not our building, but whatev.



Whee! The only time I will probably be on this campus...



This is me under our bell tower, which apparently you can see from ALL OF ITHACA. As our tour guide said, you just can't escape it no matter where you go. (I will post more pics of my--ha ha, why do I keep saying that?--building later, dinner is afoot.)



Oh, and did I mention...



I mean damn. I'll post more about it later, but the campus is GAW-GEOUS and my (snicker) building, above all the others, looks so fucking serious. Like, out of my league serious.

But in the meantime...



I can still party in their city! Woot!

Note: I may look like ass in this picture, but far more crucial is the fact that I appear taller than Vel.

She's gone. She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen.

I'm sneaking out of work early to head over to the House of Blues in Dallas to see Sara Bareilles tonight. I didn't plan it this way, but it will be the perfect end to my day before I head out to the airport tomorrow morning at some 5-in-the-AM-ungodly-hour. Watch the video, she's rad.



I'm going to the concert by myself, but I've done that plenty of other times. I'm ready for my day to be over so I can be there already!

Also, I think the temperature is supposed to drop after 12, so I can get a head start on my yummy winter clothes...hee hee.

Good idea. They say the strangers always have the best candy.

Hooray, D voted this morning, how exciting. He had a 40 minute wait as well, but woo hoo! Jesus, can you imagine what Election Day will be like?

I had the most fabulous evening. I went by myself to our little regular sushi place near the house, but there is a new manager! She and I bonded and I left 2 hours later.

Her name is Jin, she is Korean and has lived here for one year; she is married with two sons. We amused ourselves by speaking bad Japanese at each other (she lived there briefly), but she and I agree wholeheartedly on the important things in life--for example, the creativity of Hayao Miyazaki--how he has the most amazing imagination but still manages to say something important about the environment and always seems to have girls save the world. Also, we both just want very badly to be in Austin. She joked about how different her time in Austin was from DFW and it almost made her uncomfortable how friendly and homey everyone was (but she liked it). She said back home everyone told her she was a hippie.

VERY crucial was our agreement about how American TV is shit for children (except for PBS of course) and she does not have cable; I said I have always told my husband if we ever have children, there will be no cable in the house. She said yes, it's like it takes the brain out of your head and puts garbage in instead. I told her how my nieces are well acquainted with Miyazaki's films (and yes, that Totoro song is REAL catchy to all youngsters...and uh, well, everyone) and yet have no idea who Hannah Montana is. At least, I hope this is still the case.

About an hour in, she offered to reheat my udon...another half hour later, I took her up on the offer. I didn't care; the udon is always good but the conversation is rarely so nice! And she looks so young for two young sons--I told her she looked to be about 27 and she said, "I love you, Ellen!" She was just the neatest; she hugged me at the end of the night and walked me out. I told her I'm going to New York this weekend but I would send my husband out for sushi while I'm gone and that we'd be back next week. She's only been there two weeks, which is how I have not met her before, plus my udon/tempura expeditions seem to increase exponentially with the coming of winter.

You know, I'm so glad I abandoned Cheers and packing for a little udon this evening...

Honey, I could suck the alcohol out of a stick of deodorant...so you're askin' the wrong gal.

Have I mentioned how much I love Karen?



D also got my Streets of Fire poster matted and framed...and holy fucking balls, it may be the most gorgeous thing in the house. He picked out a nice trim yellow for the first matte, to match the titles, surrounded by a wide white matte with a very thin black inner edge and completed by a sexy black frame. It is gaw-geous. It's going in the kitchen/den entry, so everyone can see it.

Also, D is (clearly) back from Omaha. It was a great trip and he really enjoyed it. I also really enjoyed my first trip to Love Field (that's the bumpkin Dallas airport) in more than 10 years, woot. (HA HA.) Got to Dallas so horrendously early I stopped off at the Lounge (the Inwood's bar, who'da thunk I would be there again, but it's five minutes away...) and watched the first half of the debate. That place never used to have a TV. It's fitting (in its rapidly descending plummet to yuppie crapdom, anyway) that it now has a huge flatscreen TV...though in fairness, it served me well that night. After all, before being distracted, I was trying to study my strategy games for the LSAT. Yuck.

And speaking of law school, it has started. I got a completely random, unsolicited email from Tulsa Law (ok, seriously?) which kinda freaks me out. It just goes to show how they're watching you. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

Well, it's off to the library this morning before work...I'm going to pick up a David Sedaris book I've never read to make the flight tolerable. I also need to pack today...it's going to be weird to be able to wear my winter clothes...wicked!

[Editor's Note: Holy BALLS, I just went online to glimpse their weather and they are supposed to have AM SNOW SHOWERS tomorrow! SNOW IN OCTOBER?? Weirdness.]

J'ai une âme solitaire.

Hooray!



I know it's Texas (remind me to take a picture of the Jesus car down the street, it's unreal) but I still have to vote! There was actually a considerable line this morning, which I hope was a good thing. It wasn't long enough to make me late to work, but I think that's the first time I've had to wait in line to vote!

Very excited for my upcoming break, should be nice. Not sure how much I'm looking forward to a contracts class, but whatev. Also still playing with my LSAT games, good times.

Nursing the new salted caramel hot chocolate, which Alex recommended and I am just now geting around to trying. I thought it sounded a little nasty, but it's quite tasty. It was certainly chilly enough this morning to merit one!



What? Who finished season 3 of Will and Grace? Not me, I've been too busy studying and...oh, who am I kidding. Totally starting season 4 when I get back from New York...

Every night with Stan is a threeway--me, Stan...and Johnny Walker Black.

Ooooh, must remember to watch Saturday Night Live this weekend, apparently...hee hee.

It's almost midnight--time for Cinderella to turn into a frisky minx!

Delightful and offensive, What Obama Should Say, Pt III, from The Rude Pundit.

Mom, can I take you to my therapist? Because he thinks I'm making you up.

Ooh, and I keep forgetting to mention that my anniversary gift of firewood was delivered the weekend before last! So I'm curling up tonight with a nice fire in the bedroom (in the fireplace, indeed) and the first disc of 30 Rock. Long overdue...watching that series, that is. The kitties are always very into having fires, it's nice. Last night on our own!

Just because you're naked, doesn't mean you have to be cheeky!

So I mentioned my friend Jenny Sipes is in W--apparently she plays Susie Evans, a longtime friend of George Bush. So look for her when you see it! I'm totally excited to see the movie, but I heard it feels kinda rushed and ends up having a very movie-of-the-week vibe. Oh well. I'll go see it with bells on anyway, and I hate Oliver Stone normally.

Also, she apparently landed a role on The Young & the Restless and is supposed to start filming this year. That is so neat. I mean, I have never seen a single soap opera in my life, somehow, but the girls at work seem to keep up with that one. I don't know if anyone can pull off soap opera well, but I hope she does! (I'm still kinda fond of Soapdish and somehow imagine it's really not too far off the mark.)

It finally rained today and now it's just gorgeous and windy. Ahhh.

Vel and I are having fun challenges finding a B&B in Ithaca (or any type of hotel, really), as apparently it's still peepers season. Whoops. Forgot about that. I'm sure we'll be able to find something, it'll just be, uh, ungodly expensive! Whatever, it's only money.

I was going to catch up on some theater-movies while the husband was away, but you know...I just didn't. J's theater lost Nights In Rodanthe (thank god) after a mere 2 weeks, so I didn't get to see it...and really, there wasn't too much out worth seeing. There were a few curiosities, but somehow I just wound up watching an uncomfortable amount of Will & Grace instead. No, seriously. I dreamed about it last night. I think I need to lay off for a bit. It's not that I have to watch, it's just...it was there.

Oh and PS--did anyone else see the South Park premiere, The China Probrem? Holy fucking Jesus! Um, I cannot believe they were allowed to air that! I'm not saying it was good or bad, just...pushing the envelope like no one else ever comes close to doing. The envelope of taste, controversy...it made me shriek out loud in shock.

Wait, what flavor of ice cream goes with the destruction of a loveless marriage?

Rocky Road! Bum dum ching! Thank you, Will & Grace.

I definitely feel like a bitchy Miranda sometimes when I eat alone. Like, the dude asked me how many times, "So, just one?" And I'm not bothered by it, but it does get a little OTT, like they're afraid to ask but can't stop asking. And it's like when Miranda keeps ordering a buttload of Chinese take-out for one and she thinks they're always laughing at her.

It has been teetering on the edge of rain all day and yet...nothing. Le sigh.

I ordered the most deranged-looking animatronic cat for Sophia's 4th birthday. I can't believe she is going to be FOUR! The idea of getting him was originally kind of a joke to Vel, but then considering Sophia is quite into Fiona's MioPup I got her last Xmas...well, he's on his way! God he looks fucking insane. Couldn't the marketing people get a handle on what a sane cat looks like? (And all you cat haters can just refrain right now from any comments, thank you.)



First of all, My Little Pony called and they want their comb back. Secondly, like, how stoned is this cat? I just keep thinking of that scene in Parenthood when Rick Moranis' wife tells him, "Nathan, we're trying so hard to keep these kids off drugs..." (He's called a Furreal Kitty Cat, btw.)

Ok, they're playing Moon Dance and this song will just always, always, always be American Werewolf In London Sex Scene Music to me. And I think I recall Alex and myself laughing our asses off as small children because we thought it was just really ill-suited to the moment. I can kinda see it now, but it is kinda odd. Still makes me giggle a little.

I'm at Uno's, btw, mostly for cheese and free Wifi. I tap into the wifi of the hotel next door, and it always makes me put in my name for no reason whatsoever. I used to wonder if it was checking the room registry and matching stuff up, so I used to put in really common names, but I'm pretty sure it doesn't mean fuck-all, as I've lately taken to being "Jack Bauer," and it likes that just fine.

I'm bored. I'm going to go take my disco nap.

It is soooooooooo nice outside. I wish I was not here.

I also wish I didn't have to revise my personal statement...it's depressing me with its awfulness.

Ten more days til I can get the hell out of here. I wonder if Veloute will play a little game with me while we're there...

Take a drink when...

Riker swears - two drinks; three if it's 'hell'; whole beer if he
asks 'what the hell is going on'

Riker walks forward as if he's trying to knock an imaginary door
down with his forehead.

A female character has flawless makeup after she's been through the
ringer.

Picard straightens his uniform

Data's innards are revealed

Data uses his strength

Data is cut off mid sentence - two drinks if it's a list of
synonyms.

Data gripes about his inability to perceive human emotion

Geordie's visor is taken or knocked off

Georgie gets bitched out for faulty engine, warp drive, etc.

Beverly can't figure out some bizarre medical problem

Deanna senses something really shocking

Deanna gives us Betazoid insight into something really obvious

O'Brien has a line (this gets brutal after the third season - weak
drinkers may pass)

A crew member drinks - two if it's Picard; three if it's Picard
drinking tea; four if the tea is identified as Earl
Grey.

A bridge officer is shown in casual clothes (one drink per scene,
per officer) = two drinks if it's Beverly in a
sweater; two drinks if it's Picard in his chest
revealing bedwear.

A bridge officer appears in dress uniform (one drink per scene, per
officer)

Every time somebody is addressed by his or her first name - two if
there's some kind of sexual tension going on.

Every time they use transporter room three.

A shuttle craft seems like an unsafe place to be.

Somebody reads a book.

Somebody preaches the Prime Directive - two if it's NOT Picard

Somebody preaches about Humanity's Unique Potential

Picard has an accident or is attacked - two drink; three if it
draws blood

Picard is possessed - four drinks

An 'old earth saying' is brought up - two if Data has to have it
explained to him.

Patrick Stewart tries to speak French

Wesley talks back to his Mom.

Somebody implies that Ten Forward is a Happening Place

They fade for an advertisement playing the 'ominous horns'

Klingon is spoken - two drinks per scene in which Klingons are
alone and have no obvious reason to speak English
but do anyway.

Each scene in which a nifty new Romulan ship is shown

There's a token alien in the background with no lines - two if it's
a Vulcan.

Yellow Alert - one drink
Red Alert - two drinks
Intruder Alert - three drinks

Another Captain or Star Fleet Command officer is on screen.

There's a countdown

Every time a bridge command is handed over

The Enterprise crew avoids a confrontation instead of blasting
away.

Each scene in which the Enterprise actually fights (shots must be
fired) - two drinks.

Whole beer whenever the saucer section separates.

They contact somebody on the communicator/intercom without going to
a panel or touching anything.

A communicator isn't working or is blocked - two if it's out of
range.

New Trek contradicts a fact from Old Trek (Unfortunately, players
may be too drunk to adjudicate this rule)

My shrink? Oh honey, I only go to him for refills.

I did not just polish off the entire first season of Will & Grace. Ok, I did, but I was painting my kitchen cabinets. That makes it sound much better. Doesn't it?



Maybe I’m just getting stupid. I mean, I’m watching Will & Grace and I actually laugh. I’m not sure if it’s funny or if I’ve just lost that many IQ points. At least I’m aware of the problem. It’s a little cute, but I don’t know if it should be making me laugh. Sadcakes. I’m watching it ALONE and I constantly feel like I should apologize for having laughed. Thank god I have a mini-break coming up in a few weeks. Because this is what I have come to.

If you think about it, it's probably more shocking that it took me this long to watch it. A series about a woman living with her gay best friend? But you know how I loathe American sitcoms. And this one is no different with its predictability and its creepy laugh track...yet the two leads really pull it off...actually, no, her assistant kinda steals the show sometimes...Ok, that's way more than enough of that. Let's all forget I'm even watching it, shall we?

Ok, now I'm really going to stop going on about my LSATs, as I took a 3rd practice test and got a 159. So let's see, shall we? That gives me a 160, a 158 and a 159. Yes, studying was such a good idea. I think it's time for a new book.

The little woman is home alone this week, as D is off with his family in Omaha, Nebraska. His brother drove up to see the game this weekend (that side of the fam are all big OU fans...hee hee) and D is enduring the 12 hour trip back today and will fly home on Wednesday. So I get to watch all the bad TV I want! Actually, today I cleaned the bathroom, started painting the kitchen and studied (which included writing my god-awful personal statement). Well, you know, after all the male strippers left and I was out of bon-bons, what else was I going to do?

And for no reason, I woke up with this song in my head...



Why don't we have little bars like that here?

Oh my god, he's doing drugs! Without me!

Not that I follow sports, and certainly not football, but WOO HOO!! Suck it, OU! Bwahahahahah!!!

They're all going to laugh at you!

Um. Uh oh.



Let's say it together: "Worst. Poster. Ever." (Click on it to make the awfulness that much bigger.)

Go Fug Yourself said it best:It's like the people who made the film read the book and got to the approximately 403,328 pages about how flawlessly gorgeous Edward (the fussy vampire boyfriend played by Robert "Cedric Diggory" Pattison here) is and looked at each other and were like, "Let's skip that part."AND WHY? It seems to me that the crux of the attraction of a book/movie about a super hot vampire boyfriend would be THE SUPER HOTNESS. And the other thing is that CEDRIC DIGGORY IS HOT ALREADY! It's like they've DE-HOTTED HIM against ALL REASON.

She goes on.

But word. May have to skip that movie...

Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple.

So remember how there was that show I was uncomfortable admitting I watch? Well, I still am, but there is this OTHER show I always assumed was insipid as shit. And somehow, someone somewhere convinced me I might like it. So I put it on my queue and somehow it finally arrived at my doorstep.

You know how the first disc of any series typically sucks because it just hasn't found its feet yet? Well, that is not really the case here, and I am already sort of endeared to Will & Grace. That's right, I fuckin' said it. It's gross, mock me, fine. But it actually has some pretty good dialogue. Like, borderline witty.

My instinct is to dislike Jack, as A) he is clearly the gay Kramer of this series and B) I just hate the whole, "I am SO the comic relief! LOOK AT ME! LOVE ME!" schtick that it grates and grates and I want to destroy whomever. I sort of hated Kramer (ok, completely), but I don't hate Jack yet. He has his moments.

And I have always thought Debra Messing was totally frickin' cute. Sue me.

So while D goes out of town on Sunday, I'll be at home watching really shameless TV.

Assuming, that is, that I finished my rough drafts of my personal statement and recommendation outline I need to do. AUDIBLE GROAN. And one more practice LSAT. I need to score at least one delusionally high score to boost my ability to lie to myself. Is that too much to ask?

And it turns out I am indeed invited to tour the Cornell campus (HAHAHAH, as if they'd want me there) and I also get to sit in on a Contracts class. Seriously? I mean, I guess it's a good idea. Like, this is what you're in for, lick it up, baby, LICK. IT. UP. And yes, I SOOOOOOOOOOOO plan on making Vel sit in on that with me.

At least I am alone in the midst of Friday-night-Gloria's crowds (good margaritas) and can use the plethora of crap around me for blog fodder or potential story dialogue. Always looking for the plus, that's me.

I can do anything I want to, baby, I ain't lost.

Please, please remind me not to read Dooce while I'm in public on my second glass of wine. It was simply her letter of the month to Leta, but holy shit I had to die:

Recently we stopped giving you any treats whatsoever, not to punish you necessarily, but because I was tired of all the ridiculous negotiating over the number of bites of a meal you had to eat before dessert. So I took away dessert. Done. And it's been a lot easier than I thought it would be, except you're now a lot hungrier for normal food and are always wandering around going, "I want something in my mouth." It's not, "I'm hungry," or "I would like something to eat," it's "PUT SOMETHING IN MY MOUTH." It's funny only because this is not a phrase that any adult would say out loud in mixed company.

And now everyone is STARING AT ME. There are tears rolling down my cheeks (you may need both wine and the whole post, who knows), and I'm sure my awful attempts to hide my guffaws are simply lost altogether.

You should have told me you were looking for your intellectual equal...I could have introduced you to what's growing on my shower curtain.

I also got mostly caught up on my Netfux this weekend. I re-visited The Piano, which I hadn't seen in probably 15 years. Good stuff, but um, yeah, that's one to watch every 15 years. Not a total downer or anything, it actually had a fairly upbeat ending. Just a little intense. And I still remember little Anna Paquin accepting her Oscar...



Also saw Same Time, Next Year for the first time. I enjoy both Alan Alda and Ellen Burnstyn, I just don't normally seek them out. It had great dialogue, it was very obviously a play first. (I'm not posting any images because it has a really awful poster.) And while it's about two married people meeting once a year for a sexual rendezvous, I was impressed to see that that wasn't what it was really about. It's from 1978 and invariably somewhat dated, but it still survives quite well. It overcomes the occasional cheesiness with genuinely charming moments and one I could easily see again.

As for my books, I finished Twilight some time last week but keep forgetting to mention it. Omg. So I highly advise, if you are going to read it, that you do it in at least one or two sittings. I read most of it in one sitting and was quite into it, despite being well aware of the ickiness factor, and when I returned to it the next couple times I was just even more aware of the OTT teen angst saturating each page. And maybe it's just that the ending is was worse in that regard, but dude, the pages were basically sticking together at that point.

Still, good times. I think I also recommend that you should be female.

Also finally broke down and opened Nights In Rodanthe (hell, I borrowed it, might as well give it a shot) and it's really not all that bad. It's like eating vanilla wafers with flavorless cream in the middle, but it's not as gross as The Notebook. At least, not yet. I don't know what prevents me from reading it in public more: the large print or the name "Nicholas Sparks."

At least it's at J's theater so I can get my Diane Lane fix for free.

Ok, and here it is a few hours later and I have finished NIR. I didn't get to the end, mind you, but I got 15 out of 19 chapters read and you know, that's enough for me. I have seldom read such a dull book with such a straight path, flecked with barf chunks the whole way. Seriously, my cats have hacked up hairballs I found more engrossing. Now granted, I just got done reading Twilight, but they were a good pair to read together. The first I enjoyed for the guilty pleasure and the second I nearly fell asleep. Clearly, Stephanie Meyer got something right. Being female for a start, I suppose...

Save your pump and dump adventures for your blog.

Yeah, so that's from a show I'm really not comfortable admitting I watch. And you already know I like Ally McBeal, so back slowly away.

And from this show, I discovered a new musician whose album I bought and I'm really liking!



This is the song I really like (embedding was disabled). And what's cool is that she's playing at House of Blues in two weeks. I'm debating about going...I think I would just go by myself rather than drag the hubby to what is clearly more my type of music! But it's a really great album, there's some very sexy music on there.

But on to good TV shows, I finally got around to watching last season's finale for House, M.D. Thanks to idiots everywhere, I already knew which of the major characters bit the dust, but it was still a fah-king depressing episode. Jesus.

As for movies, I got to see Religulous this weekend with Alex, it was a lot of fun.



There is no doubt that it's not a film to watch for information, it's just about the humor. And yes, it's totally biased, heavily edited (though in fairness, there's plenty of humor directed at Bill Maher), and I cannot see anyone seeking this out unless they like Maher to begin with. But it was a very enjoyable two hours. I was afraid it would be mean, and while it's not, it kinda wastes time by addressing issues with people who have no real knowledge or background in religion and come on, that can be funny, but the targets are just too easy.

And it's official! I registered to take the LSAT, I paid my (fucking) $127. I guess I had better go study!

Laurie, Mr. Riddle is eighty-seven!

Lifted from Cute Overload...



And just the other day D sent me a pic on our phones of BABY BUNNIES someone had brought in. They were ITSY BITSY and hadn't opened their eyes yet. They actually belonged to someone, because I wrote him back and said, "I WANT A BUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYY!" And you know Mouche and Bourdain want a bunny, too.

Not that those are bunnies up there, but you know, it reminded me.

And I am totally peeing on myself to see Religulous, which should come out this week. There is no way in holy fuck my husband would ever watch that with me so who's going with me? (Ok, that's not true, he probably would if I really insisted, but he would be so pissed by the end and it would probably just make him unhappy. So I won't do that!)

Happy Friday! It's Abba time.



(Is she allowed to bounce on the piano bench like that on national TV?)